T-minus 10 days and counting! I am attempting to host Thanksgiving dinner this year. Key word being attempt. Once Momma Sal jumps in all is fair in love and turkey.
Coming to the realization that i ought to go get the groceries this week for my big hosting debut i felt it necessary to call up my mom and finalize the menu and then all the ingredients needed for each. After all, one can say she wants green bean casserole but how does one go about making it, what does one need. Do we go classic cream of mushroom or do we do cream of chicken (ode to Danielle). Keep in mind we have all been discussing the menu for about three weeks now. It caters to your basic gobbler day needs:
Mashed & Sweet Potatoes... double check
Cranberry Sauce.. check
Green Bean Casserole, California Melody, yada yada... check
Every time mention of the menu came up Momma Sal grew ecstatic of the cornbread stuffing that she's going to make. How could i forget, she reminds me every time we talk. "And oh yeah, I'm going to make the corn bread stuffing." I think she thinks it's quite culinary because it's Paula Dean or something, who knows. All i know is we've tried it before and it's not that nobody likes it, but rather everyone prefers just good ole dependable traditional stuffing. This inevitably came up in a side discussion with the Megan. Megan proposed i should just mention to mom that we should just do regular stuffing, but how can i break a mothers heart when she is SOOO excited over this damn cornbread stuffing. So then we come up with this brilliant idea.. Let's do both!!! Until we envision a nice full corningwear dish of cornbread stuffing going unscathed as we break into fist fights over the last of the Stove Top leaving my mom to ponder why nobody ate any of it besides her. Note to self, remember to take portions of both stuffing dishes. Still, none of us have the heart to mention anything.
Moving on from the stuffing dilemma, lets discuss the evolution of the grocery list conversation [Momma Sal responses]
Okay, so i do i need anything special for the turkey? [Well i can bring the Turkey, they're on sale for 99cents/lb here] Mom, i think i can manage picking up the Turkey. What do we need for the stuffing? [Well i have my corn bread stuffing mix that I'm bringing, just get celery and onions. Oh, and i also got some red potatoes because they were on sale at Cedarville Pantry so just get sour cream for the mashed potatoes and then i also have a some cans of sweet potatoes in the cupboard that I'm planning on bringing. And I'm making my pistachio dessert so i can bring the leftover marshmallows to use for the sweet potatoes.] Mom, seriously, i can handle picking up a bag of marshmallows. [But I'll just bring them anyways]. Not wanting to start a battle i just let her decide on bringing along a half opened bag of marshmallows sure to grow stale or at least amoeba's on the 9 hour trip it will endure here. After realizing she plans on bringing everything else required for the entree i ask what type of pies i should get. This, she is actually letting me get. But she didn't forget to remind me to pick up 3 containers of Cool Whip. Why we need three, I'm not exactly sure, but I'm not questioning the gobbler goddess.
On to Happy Appy's. Bridget wants to do Sliders, or "White Castles" as my mom calls them, even though I'm pretty sure there are no White Castles within 700 miles of DeTour, but nonetheless. Which leads to mom insisting she can also bring the hamburger. Mmmmmmm, that'll taste good after 9 hours in the car. Seriously Sal? This battle i won. But then we started discussing the Taco Salad that mom wants to make and of course she'll also bring the shredded lettuce, tomatoes, and green peppers. The green peppers may hold up, but I'm guessing no Tupperware even made by NASA will keep that lettuce fresh. Oh Mom! Bless her heart for mothering me. After all, it is her first Thanksgiving away from home. Or maybe second. So the grocery list is finalized, I'm pretty sure i can check salmonella off the list and have convinced my mom only to bring non perishable items with her in the car, and the conversation is done.. or is it?
After realizing my coupon for 58cents/lb seemed too good to be true i read that it said Jennie-O Hen or Tom Turkey. WTF is a Tom Turkey? After calling my mom to answer this question I'm still not sure. Is it a male turkey? That seemed to be Momma Sal's answer. So i hang up and two seconds later the phone rings. CONVINCED it will be her saying, I'll just bring the turkey, i answer and all i get on the other line is, Do you want to just do Stove Top? Wondering if Megan finally called her up and called her out i take the political route and suggest doing both. Megan said she didn't, which leaves me to ponder why on earth the change of heart. Does she not even like it herself but thinks we love it because we probably held a fake rave in it's honor? One may never know, and I'm not going to question. I say bring on the Stove Top, but maybe i will pass on it and reach right for the Cornbread stuffing. I might even force down seconds :)